“Happiness isn’t a goal… it’s a by-product of a life well lived.” — Eleanor Roosevelt
Happiness is a bad goal to directly aim for. Focus instead on improving your conditions, and happiness will naturally arrive.
Desire Is Antithetical
Goals are driven by Dopamine, and Dopamine Is The Desire Chemical, Not The Happiness Chemical. This is why Achieving Your Goals Isn’t As Fun As You Expect.
Desire Is The Root Of All Suffering, after all.
You’re probably seeking something closer to Gratitude, which is regulated by the Here & Now chemicals and is specifically characterized by a lack of external desire.
Happiness is a By-product
Contentment comes about when your Hierarchy Of Needs is well-handled. Handling that will naturally result in more happiness than directly “trying to be more happy” will.
When a metric becomes a goal it ceases to be a good metric. The feeling of happiness itself is fleeting. If you directly aim at increasing it, you’ll be over-tuned to fluctuations. You freak out about having a bad day.
The Mirage On The Sea Of Sadness
Imagine happiness as a place where happy people are happy all the time. This turns happiness into an unreachable feeling of constant bliss that no one has.
True happiness is like a bird that might land on your ship, but not if you constantly stand guard to catch it. If you improve your ship and sail into warmer waters — the bird will land when you aren’t looking.
So be sure never to do that. Aim toward the mirage of happiness rather than improving the ship upon which you sail.
— CGP Grey, 7 Ways to Maximize Misery